Well I wanted this post to be a honkey dorey one but life just isn't that way right now. Still dealing with a lot of unforeseen issues we have going on which were sparked by a few things. Buying our new car, the Duke turning 35, the housing market, having a toddler, things at work not going well for the Duke. We feel stuck. He feels like he's trapped and I feel alone. He's distant and it's just not working out well at the moment. I've spent the last 2 Saturday's in tears. I've done more crying in the last 2 months than I have in the last 2 years. We've lost our identity together. We're coexisting at the moment and it doesn't feel good. I have spurts where he seems like the old Duke and is back to normal but then it fades and life is blah again. It's a constant emotional roller coaster and I can't take much more of it. I'm trying to distance myself from it but it's hard. I've told him how I've felt but we are both hurting. I find myself saying and thinking hurtful things which isn't like me. I hate who I'm becoming right now. I'm trying to stay positive it's just so hard. I haven't really been talking to anyone about it because it's hard to pinpoint what's going on. We basically said Yes to God on our 9 year anniversary and it's been downhill since. I'm sure a lot of it is an attack on our marriage, this is so not fun. I just want to be who I'm supposed to be and do what I'm supposed to do but I'm not sure where we got lost. Please pray for us it doesn't seem to be getting better, only worse. I love you all.
Duchess Unruly Tresses